Valentine Expectations

forehead kiss dandelion

Proverbs 14:1 The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands, the foolish one tears hers down.

Proverbs 14:3 A fool’s mouth lashes out with pride, but the lips of the wise protect them.

Happy Valentine’s Day! I pray that it turns out happy, even if there are bumps. I remember the Valentine’s night when my husband made me stop the car so he could walk. I was disillusioned and scared things might never change, but my attempts to control him were completely counterproductive. It took some learning, and God did most of the work, but I’m grateful for the love we have today.

We can choose to celebrate love any time we want—the arrival of February 15 doesn’t mean we missed out. Do you have a loved one who is working or far away? Is something physical holding you back from experiencing the evening you’d like? Are you just not on the same page—you fear that the fizz has left your champagne?

If you are going to spend years with someone special—and I believe you can—then today you can lay aside any sense of urgency. Urgency and expectation can make us demanding, passive-aggressive or manipulative. Sure, if your lover says “What would you like to do today?” Be direct. It’s annoying to hear, “I dunno, what do you want to do?” But other than that, remove the pressure. When you first met, you asked questions about each other. You talked about what interested you, not about bills and gripes. Perhaps you gave each other a chance to talk about struggles and you were sympathetic and impressed with the stamina and compassion you saw in each other. You were strangers, so you didn’t expect diamonds and roses, you just enjoyed hanging out.

Today, go back to that simpler time where you appreciated your mate as a person and not as a romance vending machine. In fact, do it tomorrow, too. Heck, there are only 2 weeks left of February—you can do anything for 2 weeks. Celebrate Valentine’s Day on March 1. The restaurants will be less packed. Meanwhile, this song might bring a smile.

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